Can I get access to positive feelings when I need them?

Quote ‘You get what you focus on’ Jackie Jarvis

Don’t think about a blue tree … stop it now. I said don’t think about it! I wonder what you thought about. Did you think about a blue tree even although I told you not to? Did you try and make the blue tree go yellow?

Your mind and body react to suggestion. In order not to think about something, you must think about it first. So, if you say to yourself, I must not be nervous, you automatically access the word nervous and with it, the feelings of being nervous. This is not useful if you are just about to deliver a presentation or do your driving test. The more you think about not being nervous the more nervous you become.

Slow down and be aware

Slowing down and becoming more aware of the words you use, both inside your head and verbally you will be able to influence the states you get into. You may have caught yourself talking about a problem to a friend or partner and noticed how quickly you can get into the same negative or angry state talking about it as you felt when you were in the midst of it.
It may be useful to off load, a problem shared can be a relief, however, there comes a point where endlessly talking about it is not useful. It does not get you out of the negative state, it simply emerges you more in it.

So how can you change your state and access more positive energy and good feelings when you need them most.

You get what you focus on

It can be is as simple as changing the focus.

Think about something you really enjoy doing. Imagine yourself doing it, describe to yourself in your mind what you are doing. See pictures of yourself enjoying it. Take a deep breath and imagine yourself there now. How do you feel? Your mind doesn’t really know the difference between a real and an imagined event, so if you take your mind somewhere positive, you can access the good feelings that go with it.

If you find yourself feeling nervous about something and would prefer to feel confident and positive you can alter your state instantly by focusing it on something positive. You may choose to think about the last time you succeeded. Nerves come from thinking that something may go wrong, so think about what could possibly go right. See the outcome being the one you most want. Live it in advance the way you want it to be. You need to be consciously aware of what is happening in your mind and your body to do this.

I had to go do an Online Live TV interview the other day at short notice, so didn’t have a huge amount of preparation time. I find myself worrying a bit and caught myself doubting myself. What if I go blank?

A sure-fire way to ensure that I would go blank! In fact, as I said, it to myself, I almost forgot the name of the person about to interview me. I even had to check. I then just took a deep breath and told myself that I know my subject and I would enjoy this. It would be fun. My state changed instantly, and I relaxed and was able to do a great interview that was natural and came from the heart.

You have the power to change your state

The ability to change your state of mind will take some practice.

The first step when you find yourself getting into a negative state is to simply to take a pause. Give yourself a moment.

Became aware of the language you are using, verbally and inside your head.

Decide what it is that you want instead. Think of the positive outcome you want.

Think and talk about what you want instead of what you don’t want.

Think about the Yellow Tree (not the blue one, if you remember how I started this blog)

Change your posture. Stand or sit tall, take some deep breaths and let go of any negative thoughts with each out breath. Breath in positive energy with each in breath.
Imagine how you will feel when whatever it is you are about to do, goes really well!

See you can do it.

Positive energy is available to you when you want. Change your thoughts and you will change how you feel in an instant.

Reflections

Think about a minor problem you have right now that you have been a bit worried about?

Think about what you want, making sure your language is positive?

What is the first step you could take to move towards this outcome?

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